Pray for Chrissie

We have a sister church in Austin. The Pastor's wife sent me the link to Chrissie's caring bridge journal. Please take a moment to pray for Chrissie. She was adopted from Serbia by this precious family so she could receive the medical treatment she needs. She had her second open heart surgery on April 19 - her heart stopped, but they brought her back - she and her family are still fighting for her precious life. Please say a pray asking God, the Healer, to touch her and restore her health!


http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/forgottensawranch

The Journey: FINALLY!

We have had Baby Girl on what is called a "Fictive Kin" placement. But we were still pursuing our foster license. Seems like it has taken us forever! But I took one cat and one dog to get vaccinated today, and I think that is the last step we have to do! Tomorrow is the last home visit for the home study. Then we just have to wait for the home study to be finished and CPS to get us in the system. We have been told by the 16th, we will be official foster parents! WooHoo!!!! It is a grueling process, but well worth it! Really nothing is hard, just time consuming. If you are considering it and live in the West Texas area, PLEASE take the classes and see if this is for you. Our are is in dire need of foster families! Our children are having to be sent to Abilene and other areas because there are no homes available here. That is so traumatic on the older children...they lose everything familiar including their town and school!

Becoming official foster parents doesn't really change much except we will have more rules as we will be under Buckner and not just a "friend of the family" watching their child. It also means we will receive the stipend from the state to offset costs. I always thought it was small potatoes, but actually, it is a very helpful amount. Obviously we would do it regardless, we have been for almost two months, but the reimbursement will come in handy as she grows and needs more clothes, more toys, etc. We are thankful!

As part of finishing the process, we had to decide how many children we want to be licensed to take and what ages, etc. Obviously race doesn't matter to us. In our state, you can have up to 6 children including your own. If you go over 6, you become what is called a "group home". These are not looked on with favor by CPS (so we have been told), and you also usually have to take in older kids. So we know we want to stay at 6 or below. This means we could only take in one more child. We haven't totally made our decision, but as we talked tonight, the things to consider are many. One, we aren't an easy going family evidently! Madison coming threw all our systems into chaos. I can't imagine doing that every time a child comes in and out of our home the way some foster families do! My hats off to you guys! The other major concern is transportation. We do not have a car that seats 8. If we took in another child, we would have to take two cars everywhere we go as a family including vacation! God would have to bless us with a different car if we were able to even go on vacation. We can take two cars, but that presents problems as we do quite a bit of driving to our parents' houses which are 30 and 50 miles away. That is a lot of extra gas with two vehicles. So we will continue to pray and seek God. The nice thing is that even if we make a decision and then change our mind, we can amend the home study. The important thing is that we do what God leads...not what "makes sense".

Those who know me, know what I would do! I would take them all! I still have a little dark girl on my heart! Have no idea if that is God or just some left over 'issues' with Eden and Addy. But I trust God will reveal in time. Today has enough trouble of its own! :) For now, I know that God has blessed me with five amazing children that I don't even begin to deserve! As for a number 6? Well, the verdict is still out! And after tomorrow, we will have the option of adding number 6 pretty easily! Pretty exciting...and scary! So The Journey continues......

Aristotle visits Liberia

Criticism is something we can avoid by saying nothing, doing nothing, being nothing. ~Aristotle

I don't usually quote Aristotle, but this was in a book I am reading and hit home. I imagine this will end up on a canvas in my office! This has been one of the hardest lessons of the ministry I am in and the government work God has called me to in Liberia. So often, I know without a doubt what God is calling me to do, yet it goes against the positive public opinion. Many times it is just because when you sit in different seats you see different angles. Sitting in the seat I am in as adoption professional, been there done that adoptive parent, and person talking to the government officials, I have a different angle than many of my critics. I am also charged with the job of caring for all children, not just my personal ones who I want to adopt. I know I made this same mistake as an adoptive parent talking to my adoption agency. I just wanted Eden home, well Eden and the other two children who were being adopted when I want to get Eden. But those to come after them really weren't my concern, but they should have been.

I have been quiet many times for fear of backlash. But what God has revealed to me over the past few weeks is that the only fear that is appropriate, is fear of HIM! He is the one holding Victory in His hands. He brought this home again over Easter. He has conquered the grave. That same spirit that raised Jesus from death lives in me! Why do I have fear of man? Greater is He who is in me than he who is in the world!

There are two people that I have dealt with in Liberia who have amazed me time and again at their actions. One is just two people removed from the President. He is a Deputy Minister which is like the officials in the US government who are directly under Secretaries of the different government entities such as the Secretary of State. Mr. Joseph Geebro is Deputy Minister of Health and Social Welfare. My first encounter with this man was when a UNICEF worker advised him to put the passports of my son and the other 8 children being adopted with him on hold. He is the reason that we almost did not get to bring Toben home. He is the reason all of our adoptive families had to pay thousands of dollars to have their plane tickets changed plus the expense of staying in Liberia an extended time. However, I am pleased to say that God has replaced that money! It was His anyway! But that was just the beginning.

Since that time, this man has continually stepped in the way of Liberian children receiving care. In just our tiny organization in Liberia he has held our container captive ultimately requiring us to pay $7,000 in taxes to get what should have been a duty free container out of port. Thus he stopped the construction of a school for the children of Margibi County in Liberia. That $7,000 was going to build the walls and desks to complete the school. So thanks to Mr. Geebro, the children of Marbigi County still don't have a free school on the road to Marshall. The shell sits there, waiting for us to have the funds to complete it and open it. The Ministry of Education in Liberia is so excited about our efforts. Unlike the Ministry of Health, they have been so supportive and told us that they will help in any way they can to see that our efforts to help the Liberian children are successful. What a concept!

The next major intervention of Mr. Geebro came as the death of Matthew, a precious little boy that God entrusted to our care. Matthew's parents had been to three other organizations begging for help, but had been turned away. We were the first ones to say we would take him and all that entailed. He was our first special needs baby. Matthew taught me more than any other child we have had in our care! Matthew will live on in my heart forever...he will be memorialized in many of the actions I take as he is the motivation for them! Matthew lost his fight for life when the Ministry of Health, specifically, Geebro's office and a lady that works for him Ms. Lydia Sherman, refused to allow Matthew to travel to Ghana for the medical care he so desperately needed. We had done everything we knew to do for Matthew. We were not comfortable with Matthew having surgery in Liberia as we were concerned about what would be found when he was opened. However, unknown to me at the time, another US organization was working with the Ministry of Health. This organization was putting Matthew on their blog as if they were in charge of his care....not paying a dime or providing any food or workers for his care....but claiming he was in their care. I am pretty sure that is called fraud, but once again, any words I said in this situation made me out to be the bad guy, back to that criticism quote, while I was the one who had been fighting for Matthew all along! I was the one paying personally for his care when the agency couldn't afford it. I was the one doing the fundraiser to raise the $2,000 he needed for medical care. Which by the way, the amazing foundation called the Hext Foundation, made sure Matthew had all he needed....yet Geebro and Sherman said, NO! He can't leave because he might disappear. Disappear??? He was traveling with the woman that THEY sent to us! We were just working under what we though were their efforts to save Matthew only to find out they would block his care! I was furious! But remained silent for fear of retaliation and because of other people here affected by Matthew's death who would later turn on me as well...another lesson of how pleasing God is the ONLY way to be motivated..people are fickle! The Ministry of Health along with this organization in the US would arrange for Matthew to have surgery in Liberia and would remove him from our custody. Within only three days of Matthew being placed in the care of this other organization at the demand of the Liberian Ministry of Health, Matthew was gone. He lost the battle with life. Lydia herself told us that the home was not fit for foster children and the conditions Matthew were in were not sanitary. Really? Then why did you order him to go there? Aren't you charged with caring for the children of Liberia? Isn't that the whole purpose of the MINISTRY OF HEALTH AND SOCIAL WELFARE?!

Then most recently, Geebro has been accused of taking the government subsidy checks for 18 orphanages over the past 9 months. The Ministry of Health was supposed to close down these orphanages and relocate/reunify the children. But guess what? He didn't! The children are still in the care of these orphanages, the only difference? Geebro took their money! The man in charge of seeing to the well-being of Liberian children was pocketing the money given by the government to feed them. Did you see that in the Liberian papers? Of course not! Why? Because we are afraid? Afraid of what he will do since his office is in "control" of adoptions.

Well, I'm not afraid anymore! You know why? Because as I was reading my Bible this morning, I started counting the number of times I have "Geebro" written in my Bible. Why? Because as I read, God gave me promises over this man over the past2.5 years! You see, God doesn't take kindly at all to people messing with His orphans! In fact, God says it is better for a man to tie a heavy brick around his leg and jump in a lake than to cause one of his little ones harm! God also says in Proverbs 25 that the Redeemer is strong and will not plead the case of anyone who goes into the field of the fatherless. Now, these officials may not be afraid of me, and they may not think I have any power over them, but God sure does! They may get by with this for awhile, but God will have the final say....just as He did at the Resurrection! Praise God!

So here are a few places where Geebro is written in my Bible:

• Proverbs 22 ~ Do not rob the poor because he is poor, or crush the afflicted at the gate; for the Lord will plead their case and take the life of those who rob them. ~ In Jesus Name!


• Proverbs 11 ~ The righteousness of the blameless will smooth his way, but the wicked will fall by his own wickedness. ~ In Jesus Name!


• Proverbs 10 ~ He who walks in the integrity walks securely, but he who perverts his ways will be found out. ~ In Jesus Name! ~ Doing wickedness is like sport to a fool...what the wicked fears will come upon him, but the desire of the righteous will be granted. ~ In Jesus Name! ~ The way of the Lord is a stronghold (protection) to the upright, but ruin to the workers of iniquity ~ In Jesus Name!

And that is just in Proverbs! These are God's promises to me! This is what God has said to me when I have said, should we forget about adoption in Liberia? Should we cave to the demands of UNICEF and Save the Children as they make demands on these government officials if they want to keep their money! I have spoken to NUMEROUS senators, the Minister of Health the advisor to the President, even the Vice President of Liberia. They all know what this man is doing yet he holds his position! I pity these leaders when they get to judgement day as the blood of Matthew as well as the numerous other children who have been denied life because of the direct actions or their careless attitude toward the complaints brought to them about Geebro's office! God will have the final say regardless of what is done or not done on this earth!

The battle has been lonely lately! We have a group of adoption service providers. We are working together, a huge miracle in and of itself! But we are all weary as well. We feel like our efforts to help the children of Liberia are blocked at every angle and the ones with power in Liberia are really not concerned about the children. Like in any political game, they are not the "hot topic", so they get ignored. Adoptive parents are weary. Of course! Many have had their lives on hold for two years or more. That is eternity when you are waiting on a child! It wears you down and wears you out. There are really no words to describe it. When you are in that place, you want someone to blame. And I am the easiest person. I become the bad guy. That makes the battle even lonelier.

But then I read the quote again. Even when it is the people I am helping who want to turn against me, I still must fight on. Why? Because it is the children who need me...and ultimately, it is God I work for, not man! I have been silent because I felt maybe the crowd was right...maybe we needed to be silent and let the "system" work. Well, we are 15 months into a halt on adoptions that has seen the death of at least two children and who knows how many countless others that those of us funded by adoption fees could have helped but didn't because we have no money and our homes are full. Fifteen months into this, being quiet hasn't helped! As I was reading and praying about what to do, Proverbs 31:8-9 came to mind. I looked it up. "Open your mouth for the mute, for the rights of all the unfortunate. Open your mouth, judge righteously, and defend the rights of the afflicted and needy." These kids are the mute! They are the unfortunate, the afflicted and needy! It is not just the kids, it is their families! They put them in our care because the conditions of Liberia and the neglect of the government brought them to a place of desperation! Proverbs 31 doesn't say be silent and wait. It says open your mouth and defend! I don't know what all that means right now, but I know sitting and waiting is over! Even if I have to go alone, God will give me the sling shot and stones to defend the giant if no army will fight with me.

If you are reading this, would you pray these scriptures with me? It is in God's Word that heaven is moved and battles are won. My bubbly, always smiling children are now forlorn and downcast. They are losing hope! I refuse to stand by while that happens! Pray with me about the next step. Is it a media campaign to expose the officials in Liberia? We have not done that because we have wanted to "play fair" while those on the other side publish untrue accounts of adoption agencies and the mistreatment/trafficking of children while they take the food right out of their mouths and we remain silent. Pray that Madam President would somehow see this post and know the acts of those in her Cabinet toward the children of her country. Pray that those here in the US dancing with the enemy would read this and tell Geebro and his office so they too can read it and hear the Word of God. Pray for their hearts to be changed. Pilot was made for the day of evil, I often wonder if that is true of these people who have all experienced the wonderful American life, whose families are still here in America while they block the poor of Liberia from being adopted and coming to have that same freedom and privilege their families enjoy. Have they too been made for the day of evil that God can use them in the same way He used Pilot, or will God use what is about to come in their demise to turn their hearts to Him and bring them to their knees and ultimately back to relationship with Him.

Pray with me! Write your Senators here in the US! Why when we are going trillions in debt are we sending millions to Liberia for them to eat the food of the children? Write your local media! Put a link to this on your blogs....to steal a Buckner motto...DO SOMETHING! Please!

God, forgive us for remaining silent. Guide us in Your ways as we seek to move forward. Silent us when we should be silent give us stones when we need to slay the giant! ~In Jesus Name ~ Amen and Amen!

I want to be like them when I grow up!

I just have to brag on my parents! I seriously could not have survived the last at least year without them! Life has been really tough. Tough in almost every way. But my parents have been there for me....in every way!

We have not always seen eye to eye! Mom and I had a great relationship growing up. It is because of her that I was so determined to be a stay at home mom, and even though God has called me into the ministries of adoption and humanitarian aid, it is the example of a mother that Mom gave me that keeps my priorities straight. My family will come first! I saw my mom be the mother to so many of my friends who had working moms. When they forgot their lunch or homework, it was my mom they called! When they wanted to know the details of sex, it was my mom they talked to. I can remember thinking at a pretty young age, I will not work because I never want my kids to have to find "another" mother! I want to be the mom like my mom is!

But even with that great relationship, we hit a bump when I was a teenager. I didn't sow any wild oats, but I am sure I wasn't always the most respectful teen either (at least that is how she tells the story! lol!). Dad got tired of being referee and we did end up in family counseling my senior year, and a decision was made that I would go to Tech the first year of college instead of living at home and going to a junior college. It was time for me to be on my own, and my wise parents recognized that and encouraged me in that way. There were rocky times after that, but through it, Mom and I always talked and tried to understand one another and make changes in the way we treated and talked to or with each other in order to preserve the relationship.

I have always been a "Daddy's Girl"! I had the best daddy a girl could dream of. He told me almost daily that I was beautiful and special! I knew that my daddy loved me unconditionally. I still know that even at 36 years old. When I would sit on my floor and cry for hours because I was overweight or because I didn't have a boyfriend, he would come sit with me, rub my back and tell me how beautiful I am. When I would tell him that he was just saying that because he was my daddy and he had to, he would always have some come back that would make me laugh and start to lift the cloud hanging over me! As I got older, he stayed the strong silent one as I faced the challenges of growing up with strong morals in what was becoming a moraless world (nothing like it is today or will be when my kids are teens!).

But even though I had an amazing childhood, we have had our differences as adults. We have had conflicting views in religion and faith. Sometimes they put a pretty big wedge between us. Mom and Dad have not always understood or even agreed with the things J0hn and I have done in our lives. Sometimes they (well Mom) was more vocal than I had wished she had been. Sometimes it caused us to have some pretty heated fights. But even in those times, we always came back and talked through it or came to a mutual agreement to agree to disagree. And I always knew the reason for any comments she made, even the ones I disagreed with, were made out of her concern for me and my well being.

Two of the things that my parents have struggled with understanding are our adoption of the children and our work in adoption that brings lots of hard ache, takes me half way around the world from my family frequently, and requires a lot of my time and energy. And most recently, my parents have wanted to commit me to the funny farm for taking on Baby Girl and all that goes with her!

BUT despite these difference and not really understanding why we do what we do and probably not even agreeing with it, they have been an invaluable help and support through the last year! I can honestly say that without them, I don't know that my family would have made it and surely would not have been able to do all God has called us to this past year!


Let me just tell you a little of what they have done. They volunteer on a regular basis at the office and send out all of my donor receipts. They spend hours making sure they have everything exactly right and have a good record of the receipts they send. Daddy has even started a donor data base for me. They are both PTA members at the kids' school. Last week, they drove teachers around to deliver pizzas for a fund raiser from 4:30 to 8:30! They were the only grandparents there! Sometimes I take for granted what they do until something like this and it hits me how unique they are in their involvement with my family!

When we had our garage sale to raise the money for our emergency fund, they came and worked. They worked for almost a week! They helped us set it up, they donated items for us to make money, mom made lunch every day we had the garage sale, mom cleaned house and did laundry during the down times of the garage sale, Daddy played taxi taking Toben to a birthday party, Daddy even took a crying Baby Girl and rocked her to sleep...that is a HUGE task for just about anyone but me (she is a momma's girl!)

They took me and the kids to the sandhills for Spring Break! Dad even bought the kids a sand disc...I had to tease him because he would NEVER have done that for Keith and I! They made all the plans, took the dinner...all the kids and I had to do was show up and enjoy the trip! It was amazing and has gone down in my kids' books as one of their favorite "vacations"...it is only a fifty mile drive and we were only gone a few house, but they still call it a vacation! Maybe we need to get out of town more often! :)

I really can't even begin to name all that they do and have done! This past week as I reflected on the involvement of my parents in my life, I was overcome with gratitude! I do not tell them enough how much I appreciate them! Have we always gotten along or seen eye to eye, NO! But through those times, we have fought for the relationship to stay in tact. And through those times, I think we have come to a mutual respect and probably have the best relationship we have ever had!

Most importantly, my parents gave me the firm foundation on which my faith has been built! They instilled in me a love and fear of God that has brought me to the place I am today. I never had "wild days" because of the foundation they laid for me. Were my parents perfect? Are they perfect? No! None of us parents are! John and I joke all the time that we better start saving now for the therapy our children will need to recover from our parenting. I believe that we as parents all do the best we can. We all give what we have to our children and sometimes that includes our baggage. My parents did their best. I was just blessed beyond measure to have won the jackpot in getting the parents I did!

I am blessed! I would not trade my parents for anyone else's! My children are blessed to have them as grandparents!

So Mom and Daddy, THANK YOU! Thank you for setting an example for me to follow of how I want to be to my children, not just as they are little, but for a lifetime. And thank you for always fighting for our relationship even during the tough times! I am so thankful we never let our differences divide us to the point of losing our relationships! I love you! God gave me the greatest gift I could have ever needed when he gave me you!

The Best Easter Ever!

Our church knows how to throw a party! We had the most amazing Easter celebration this morning! It was by far the best Easter celebration I have attended! The local symphony also participated. It was just a combination of things, but made me so appreciate our church home and who they know God is and their desire to see all people know the Victory that is ours because of what today represents!

We had dinner with John's parents last night and then dyed eggs. Today we had lunch with my parents and hunted eggs. I was so proud of Toben! We always have one empty egg that is hidden with their eggs. Toben was a little disappointed when he saw the empty egg, but then I asked why the egg was empty, and he knew right away! He said, "The cave was empty!" That's my boy!

So here are our family Easter pics minus Baby Girl who can't be posted on here! Praying you had a blessed Easter and that it doesn't end today!