Eight years ago today, Addy Joy Petree lost her battle with cholera and took her last breath on a road in Sierra Leone while riding to the hospital in an ambulance that was just too late. We were three months into the adoption process. She was three years old. We only have this one picture of her.
But this one picture, it was enough. Enough to make me fall in love and know that she was mine. I know that is hard to believe and just sounds dramatic, but for those who have adopted and have received a picture, you know what I mean! You truly do fall in love with that little person on the other side of the picture!
The call came while we were in Midland, we lived in Garden City at the time, watching the Watoto Children's choir oddly enough! We had just spent the entire evening dreaming about our twin girls half way around the world after watching a group of children from the same continent sing and dance in traditional African custom. Callie and Noah were so excited as they watched these children and wondered if the girls would know how to dance like that.
When we got home there was a message from our adoption agency saying we needed to call as soon as possible. We immediately knew it probably wasn't good as we had never received a call from them without us initiating the conversation! John called her back as I was busy getting kids ready for bed. We really didn't expect her to answer, but she did. I could tell by John's side of the conversation it wasn't good, but I couldn't tell exactly what was happening. Then he went on the back porch and literally locked me inside. He put his foot on the door so that I couldn't come out and hear what was happening. I knew then it just wasn't good, it had to be catastrophic! When he was done with the phone call, he came back in. Right there in our kitchen he delivered the news...Addy was dead. It took a little while for the words to register. The details were sketchy, but the one thing we knew for sure was that cholera was the reason. I am ashamed to say before that moment I knew nothing about cholera even though it is among the top killers in third world countries. I went to the computer and looked it up. What I read lit a fire in me that hasn't been put out yet, and I pray never is! All she needed was an antibiotic and an IV. Basically, she died from dehydration due to the excessive vomiting and diarrhea caused by cholera. My American brain could not wrap itself around the idea that my precious baby was gone because of a preventable illness! I became angry. I didn't even know who or what I was angry at, but I was angry. That anger was fueled by the tears that flowed from Callie as I told her that night that we had lost Addy. Even at 4 years old, Callie had a heart for the less fortunate of the world that set her apart. That heart broke that day for her sister. It has only been in the past three or four years that Callie doesn't get really upset with me when I don't add Eden and Addy to our "count" of children when people ask how many we have. Watching her grieve Addy was the only thing harder than handling my own grief and questions left by her death.
Over the next few weeks, God would use Addy's life and untimely death to call John and I to a life committed to the orphans of this world. That path has taken several twists over the last 8 years. But it started with that call and continued two weeks later when we were standing in a laundry room in San Antonio folding laundry before packing up to head home from our family vacation. John looked at me and said, "I think God is asking us to open an adoption agency." My answer: "In about 18 years, that would be a fabulous idea! When the kids are grown and I can go to work, I would love to do that." Remember, I had a 4 and 3 year old at home and was still planning to bring Eden home which would make 2 three year olds and a four year old! Not the ideal setting for starting up an adoption agency. Plus, I was still at a stage in life where just cleaning house overwhelmed me! How would I EVER start any kind of business/ministry from scratch and keep it up? But I also knew this had never been even a hint of a dream to John. It was my dream! But God knew that it would take speaking to John and putting it on his heart to convince me to give it a try. I agreed to pray about it. When we got home, I talked with our home study provider who was in the process of becoming a licensed agency. The doors just began to open. Each step was revealed as it needed to be done. And the rest is history! Addy's Hope has been in existence for 7 years. God has placed 38 children from Liberia in Christian families here in the US. We built two medical clinics, a school and an amazing children's home through those connected to Addy's Hope. And now we are serving the children in our own backyard. No, they may not die from cholera, but they are dying in our foster system. Dying a spiritual death. It's funny when I look back at what started us on this journey! It makes me realize how immature I was at the time...but proof once again that God calls you
RIGHT
WHERE
YOU
ARE to accomplish the work He has for you! I thought we were just saving lives, physical lives. But what God would quickly show me is that we were saving their souls! He was asking us to work on the behalf of children who left where they were might never know the saving grace of Jesus or live lives that had equipped them for all He had for them in His kingdom.
Often you hear that time heals all wounds. Time has made it a little easier. But it will still hit me at weird times. I can see an African baby girl and be overcome with grief. Often when I see twins, my heart breaks and the tears will come. I was thinking about this not too many weeks ago when I was in the mall and something triggered the sadness again. It seems to be a grief that doesn't really ever heal. I mean I miss my Grammy so much it hurts sometimes, but even in those moments it is not a crippling grief. There is a peace that she lived a long life and while we miss her, we appreciate the time we had with her. Losing Addy has never had that peace. I am assuming it is probably like that with all parents who lose children too soon in this earthly life.
I was sharing with another mom who lost a baby they were adopting through us in Liberia. She has gone on to do amazing things in Ethiopia through her organization Because Every Mother Matters. She is preventing orphans by supporting moms! Truly amazing things! Spurred on by the death of a little girl half a world away whom they loved through a picture.
But as I shared with my friend, I think our girls would be proud! I think they would feel honored by the fires started by the sparks of their short lives. So today even though tears will fall, all in all, I am blessed to have been a part of her short life. And I am thankful that God turned the ashes from her death into the beauty of the ripples left from her.
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