"Give your entire attention to what God is doing right
now, and don't get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with
whatever hard things come up when the time comes.” ~Matthew 6:34 (MSG)
We are 19 months into the placement of our 17 year old
daughter, and 13 months into her adoption as our legal daughter. Our first grand baby will be delivered by her
this month. This will put our youngest
at 13 months older than our grand baby. The
last 19 months have held two run aways, one attempted run away, countless words
of rejection and manipulation, having our windows screwed shut and our hearts
broken over and over. Our faith has been
stretched, and our capacity to love unconditionally has been taxed. I had a fellow adoptive mother ask me a
couple of weeks ago, “so would you do it again?” I hesitated a second and answered with a
resounding, “Yes!” God told us this was
the path and we walked it in obedience.
I would never want to walk in disobedience by saying “no” to a request
from the One who went to the cross for me!
Then I quickly added a disclaimer.
If God had presented me with a script of the next year and asked me to take
this child into my home before I had ever met her, I could not have said
yes! My heart would have failed right
there! But that is not what He
does! Matthew 6:34 is clear about
that. He will give us just enough
strength, love, grace and mercy to handle today. We are not to worry about what “may or may
not happen tomorrow.” So yes, I would do
it again! I have learned to trust fully
in God. He is my sustainer and my
literal breath of life to make it through each day…and just that day! In the next few weeks I will become MiMi at
38 years young with 6 children still left to raise of my own. If I dwell on the days ahead I will be
overcome with fear, doubts, insecurities and possibly even regrets. But when I focus on today, trusting Him for
each step, each breath, I make it! And
not only do I make it, but I learn more and more about the faithfulness and
amazing love of the One who called me to this great adventure!
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