The Journey: Today is the Day!

Today is the day! We go this afternoon to visit Little Guy! I have butterflies! I don't remember the last time I had butterflies...probably at the court hearing where the judge ordered Baby Girl to be placed with us! John is still waiting to see at the visit before he totally knows what we are to do. I am still keeping my head on straight that he may not end up with us because so many things have to happen between now and then...at least I think they do. I have sent an e-mail asking what happens next if we say "yes"?!

I was laying in bed last night unable to sleep, and I started thinking about the past few days. I was just overcome with love for my Lord! In four short days, He has totally transformed a portion of my heart. You know how we always throw around Psalm 37:4 that says God will give us the desire of our heart? Well, this week showed the first part to be key and vital to the last part. The entire verse says, "Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart." You see, I have spent this week pouring over God's word, on my knees with my face to the ground pushing hard into God asking for His direction. I have seen Him answer me in so many ways! He has answered me throughout the day as I am doing a task that will be harder with Little Guy here...but even as I start to get anxious about it, God will overcome me with peace and a quiet whisper that says, "Together, we can do this!" He has given me words from The Word that pierced straight through me even to dividing bone and marrow as I read them. Really, there is no doubt that God has spoken! He has give me absolute confidence and spoken as many times as I needed Him to in order to confirm that this is the path we are to walk.

But even all that is not the most exciting part to me. The most exciting part is that what I spoke of yesterday as "undesirable" has now become the desire of my heart! I have delighted myself in my Lord and in return He has made His desire My desire! Only a loving God can do that! Only a loving God can take what was initially an overwhelming fear and turn it into a dream come true! I am already in love to some extent with a little two year old boy! I have no idea what he looks like...don't even know what color his skin is, but I see a little fuzzy head walking around in my mind, and my heart skips a beat! Only God can do that my friends! Only God!!!

Please pray for us! Pray that John and I are in agreement. Pray that Little Guy bonds if this is where he will be. Pray that my children have hearts open for him...they are all WAY excited for the meeting this afternoon...well, everyone but Ava and she doesn't know yet because she is with her Grommy and Grandpa! Pray that the transition will begin soon and go smooth. Pray that family understands as they receive the news that they will have yet another grandchild/nephew. Pray that God provides for the necessities - like a bed! :) I am looking for miracles today! I am expecting great things! What a day this will be!