Happy Birthday Toben!

Today is my precious baby boy's birthday! He is four today. Wow, four! That is really bitter sweet. I mourn the three years I missed of his life! I wonder what he looked like as a baby? Did he sleep good? I will never regain those years....but in some way, I think God uses that to help me get just a small glimpse of what Toben mourns in leaving everything he knew to come to America and be a part of our family. It is the closest thing I will ever have to trying to relate.

This past year has been a whirlwind! So many trials and struggles...and yet Toben hasn't been any of those! He has adjusted amazingly well! He is just amazing! He is perfectly bonded, and I am getting there! His sweet smile and contagious laugh have been such a bright spot in our home...and I look forward to many more years of those!

My Precious Toben,

God is good! That is what your name means! Oh how true that is and oh how God has used you to drive home that fact! You have born way too much weight for a little boy! You carried four years of broken adoption dreams for me. Yet, you have bore them like a champ! God has used you to heal many wounds left when Eden didn't come home. You fulfilled a life-long dream of a multi-racial family! I never thought that it would be possible to forget that you are "different"...yet I find myself looking down and being shocked that a dark brown boy stands next to me! You are just my son now!

I know the years ahead may have challenges as you grow into the man God desires you to be...questions about why you are different, why you were born half a world away, why you were brought here? I don't have the answers to those, but I do know that I will be eternally grateful that God saw fit to put you here! What an awesome blessing to be your mommy!

God has big plans for you my Obie! You wear your name proudly! I pray that I will be all the mommy you need as you go through the bumps and trials of growing up in this lost world. I look forward to many more birthdays with you....celebrating the life God gave you and preserved and brought to us! May God bless you my little man! I love you!

Love,

Mommy

We will be celebrating at Chuck E. Cheese tonight with a power ranger birthday as requested! :)