This post has been a long time coming! - Part Two

So I did explode...several times! My kids thought there mom had lost her mind, I am quite sure. I can remember one time having to leave the house and walk around it several times to calm down and wondering if I really was losing it! John would just look at me like I was nuts, well I probably was!

I didn't understand what was happening! I have always been a very put together, controlled person. Who was this woman and when was she leaving?! I still don't fully understand it all, but I know God had a purpose and is still showing me growth that came from this very dark time!

Sometime last Spring, we finally decided that enough was enough. I had a dear mentor that I had shared all this with, and she agreed that there was not choice but to quit the agency. I had to get my family and life back. I had to get away from the attacks that the agency brought (spiritual and literal) and focus on my husband, children and home which should always be my first ministry!

I talked to John and it was decided. I would quit the agency. That sounds simple, but in fact it would mean major life changes for us! I don't make much! In fact, one of our dear board members when he found out what I make said, "I wouldn't mow yards for that!" I thought that was great! It has never been about the money! It is about the children and the families. But the little I did make is what allowed us to buy the house I am in. When you are on a shoe string budget, even $20 makes a difference! So for me to quit the agency meant having to move. The housing market was such where we live that we could make really good money on our house, but didn't want to spend what we would have to in order to live here. There were other issues as well, so we decided to move. A job came open in John's home town and he felt called to apply for it. It would mean leaving a job he loved to go back to being a principal, a job he likes, but has a lot of stress and expectation that we have enjoyed being out from under!

He sent in his application on the last day the job was open. He had been asked by the superintendent to apply, so we felt pretty confident he would get the job. We started looking at house in a town where there were literally 2 houses for sale! Well, 3 counting the one that we were scared we were going to fall through the floor!

He went in to tell his boss that he had applied for the job. His boss shut the door and ask him to reconsider. The boss told John that he had been offered a job at a university and was seriously considering taking it. The plan had always been for John to take his position when he left. So that threw another monkey wrench in things!

So the waiting and praying began. John would end up getting both job offers. He decided to take it, but even with his wonderful raise, we would not be able to make house payments and care for four children. We kept looking for houses in John's home town which would be a 45 minute commute for him. But no houses that we could afford and live in were available. We even looked at building, John's dream! We started fixing up this house to sell. Doing in expensive remodels to make more money. And praying that God would provide a house in the town we were looking at!

to be continued........